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Maximale hypotheek
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Oneself (versus healthy selfishness) E-mail
Yourself oneself
Selfishness is one extreme. Altruism is always ready for another without any self is not healthy. For the balance between selfishness and altruism can be found, the term healthy selfishness mind. This means taking into account the wishes of yourself and with those of another, self-confidence and clearly define what you want and not want.
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Many people are too nice to be found by others.
Yourself to death to others is usually from an inferiority feeling. By helping others, you just feel that you are less empty inside. Many people are constantly seeking compensation for the unhappiness they feel in themselves.
Healthy selfishness can only achieve if you have a real picture of yourself have. Remember that nobody is perfect, accept yourself as you are and you are not the way everyone can make. You must choose between self-interest and that of another, that is not always easy.
Your own guilt or working on your guilt is soon to arise. It is always a choice. First you become separated from unjust guilt.

Oneself in a relationship is also very common, you often have the feeling that everything and gives little in return. This could be a very unhappy and insecure feeling. Sometimes this is not easily reversed, but remember that a good relationship and should be in balance. Often the other is not fully aware, a good and honest conversation can solve much. Try it not a reproach to form, do not expect the other lot has changed, look first to your own behavior. Krop unhappy feelings not because those too will all other feelings prevail.

We are all responsible for the people around us, but we are also responsible for ourselves. Too much of one is not good, too many of the other not. Healthy self-interest ensures that your own happiness achieved without our commitment to others decreases.

How do you change yourself if you caring nature is a problem for yourself:

  • If you are unhappy about your own behavior, try to determine whether a pattern is in situations where you always end up. Look what your objective is to share here. You can in this way a so-called trap for you to discover.
  • Have a helicopter view of the case, do you imagine how you would react if you look to someone else who has the same behavior as yourself.
  • Try to determine your own limits and take you also to defend. That someone may go if they try to go further than you accept this anymore. Try for yourself to clearly define what you want and especially what you want and not try yourself and others and to keep.
  • Research and acknowledge your weaknesses and come from honest. If you have a better picture of yourself creates the reality you're constantly working to prove yourself. It is also very complicated as you present yourself differently towards different people who then suddenly at the same time together. In short do yourself and learn to know yourself. Try to accept that not everyone is nice to find you.
  • Learn to discover when your guilt is going to work, and then clear that you do not find pleasant.
  • Learn to say no if someone at a very inopportune moment to help aanklopt. If you do not have time, you may speak when you have time. Try to be fair and not an excuse to bottom. Let notice that you have interest for others but it is not possible. In most cases, the other is to them.
  • Leer that you are not responsible for the whole world, for yourself.

Aartie Ramcharan

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